a collection of vegan recipes


rawktober: day nine

I've got herpes.

- insert awkward pause -

     Sheesh, guys, chill out! I can see you freaking out over there, desperately dragging your mouse towards the close button on this open tab before you catch the virus via computer screen!!! Eeeek!!! What I mean is that I've got the gene for mouth herpes- in other words, I get cold sores. Yes, they're ugly. Yes, they hurt. And Yes, it sucks. But no, they're not contagious unless you also have the gene. For me, there's a few things that trigger my cold sores: stress, sleep deprivation, weather, and, of course, contact with someone who's got one. Since I'm obviously oh so painfully single at the moment, the first three factors must've set off these babies I've been sporting since yesterday! Wheee! ...not. Any of you that get cold sores know how big of a pain in the ass they are. I'm not even gonna start my rant. What I am going to do, however, is share a recipe for the scrumptious meal I prepared for myself this evening in honour of the offensive sprouting going on on my labium and of my sovereignty at the dinner table (aka life). 
Read on for the recipe as well as some tips on dealing with labial herpes (bro, I feel ya)

Serves one

mushroom steak
1 portobella mushroom cap
2 TBSP tamari/soy sauce
2 TBSP balsamic vinegar
2 TBSP oil of choice
splash of liquid smoke
1 clove garlic, crushed
spices (pepper, thyme, oregano, basil)

Place all of the above ingredients in a ziploc baggy and leave to marinate overnight in the fridge. If desired, heat in a dish in the dehydrator for an hour or so before consumption.

"mashed potatoes"
1 parsnip
1/2 avocado
pinch of pepper 

Process the above until smooth and creamy (or whipped, if you're that patient!)

Herp-da-derp rules:
1. Don't touch it
2. Put ice and lemonbalm on it
3. Take Lysine supplements
4. Make sure your ratio of Lysine and Arginine proteins in foods favours the former (you can find a list here or anywhere online)- basically, avoid nuts and chocolate. Eat avocado for fat & calories instead.
5. Don't let it get you down!

1 comment:

  1. THAT LOOKS SO YUMMY. I've been wanting to make portobello steaks for a while. Thanks for the recipe! Sorry 'bout the mouth herpes, man. Hope that clears soon!